The reasons for retiring are numerous, but the major one that drove my decision was my desire to be relevant wherever I was in my life phase. I didnt think I could continue being relevant clinically for much longer! Having now been out of the clinical world for two years, and it being a New Year, I thought it important for me to ask myself a few questions. I recommend you do something similar as you set up goals for 2023:
- Where am I relevant these days, and does this give my life meaning?
- How can I help others around me to feel relevant?
- What challenges will likely face me in 2023? How will I deal with them?
Where am I relevant?
I am blessed to know that my life matters to many. Because of my wife; my kids; my friends, and many mentees whom I have helped through the years I feel special. They fill me with joy and meaning! I make myself relevant these days by attempting to be who I am when I am connecting with them. It gives me joy to help others to develop a sense of purpose, and to focus on goals that will give satisfaction to them; and I feel relevant because I make an effort to help people grow and thrive. This all sounds like I have an inflated view of myself! The point that I am actually making here is that I get more from being a husband/ father/friend or mentor than those on the other side of the equation. I feel relevant because people allow me to love them and care for them. A second area of relevance is in my ability to take on projects and get them finished. I recently completed a laundry renovation project that worked out well. This, plus my ability to express myself creatively gives me a special sense of relevance.
How can I help others around me to feel relevant?
We are who we are because of how we impact others. I need to make more effort to regularly connect with my family members, friends and mentees. I need to be prepared to help them face the struggles of life, and to let them show love towards me. I truly believe that it is in the act of giving/ loving that the butterfly in all of us is set free. I don’t know how I will let others care for me this year, but I will make a conscious effort to receive love as well as give it! Making others feeling relevant also requires that we listen to each other, and that we respond in a transparent manner to questions that are asked of us. I commit to listening better. It also requires that I treat others as I would have them treat me.
What are the challenges in 2023 and how will I face them?
- Travel will stretch me thin. Its likely that we will have to do several trips to Vancouver, as well as show some of our family round BC. This is not only financially straining, but also takes a lot out of the old bones of a 68 years old! I intend to get myself fit, lose some weight, and sleep better – all of which will help me accommodate this challenge better.
- I think the time is coming for me to accept that my contribution to leadership development probably will be in the form of written material rather than workshops or coaching. Even though I will be conducting several workshops in the New Year, I have not had no new coaching opportunities for over 2 months. I am okay with this development, even though I have decided to maintain my website during 2023.
- An exciting challenge will be my daughter’s wedding to Thom Coombes in the summer. This, plus her move to Newfoundland will be both exciting and daunting. I am going to give her all my love both in a practical and emotional sense, so that she knows just how special she is to me.
- Finances – we will have to prepare for budgets and taxes, so that we can afford some of these trips and other commitments. I’ll let my accountant and financial planner help with these important areas. We’ll be okay!
- Health – I don’t know what to predict! Whatever happens, I know I need to be more healthy than I currently am.
I am so thankful for God’s care over me during 2022; and for the love of so many. It has made retirement meaningful, as I seem to have continued being relevant in many life’s around me- who can ask for anything more than that?
As you look into your 2023, may you find meaning and joy in life.
Peter Craighead
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